Happy Father's Day? I don't think so!

Apparently today is "Father's Day". As I write it's possible that fathers all across the United States are receiving cards and gifts. Pardon me if I don't join in the fun.

I happen to have a father, and a mother. They brought up two children, one of whom is yours truly, in a classic American household. They are still married (48 years this month), and still live in the only house in which I can remember them living. And, in addition to my own experience, I know and have known quite a few other people who have (or at least remember having) fathers of their own.

While is it statistically probable that there are some good fathers out there, it is my experience that most fathers are a**holes who should never have had children. I feel somewhat similarly about mothers, but fathers definitely lead in the terrible people category. So, instead of taking the usual American path and ignoring shortcomings in an effort to pretend that all is the media-fed ideal, I think it's time to call a spade a spade. Let's be honest here:

Dad, you suck! If you would have spent a few minutes contemplating children before having any, perhaps you would have realized what a horrible father you would be. You're the one (with mom) who chose to procreate. We didn't just invade your home unexpectedly one night while you were finishing dessert. As a result, you implicitly agreed to have your life filled with some considerable amount of disruption and sacrifice. You have no moral right to punish your children for your own shortcomings. I hope you spend this "Father's Day" filled with the memories of all you have done wrong over the years. Only if you can "man-up" and accept responsibility for these failings can there ever be hope of striving toward the perfect father-child relationship that the day mandates we pretend to have.